 
    Frank’s Shorts is a collection of my short stories written over the last several decades and today. I decided to create a blog to host my stories to solicit comments and suggestion from you the reader. I really hope you will take the time to read the multitude of diverse narratives I have composed; some are humorous, some sad, and some mysterious, but I hope they are always INTERESTING to you my readers. Thanks for dropping in and please feel free to comment.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
FF XVIII, 34
 
    \Frank Facts and Reviews
    Volume XVIII, No.  34
    Sunday, November  11, 2012
    Peggy transported  me from here to the church where we play Bridge each Tuesday. I had made some  chicken salad from a ten pound bag of chicken leg quarters (I did not use all  ten pounds, but enough to make several sandwiches and luscious chicken  soup--with vermicelli--for three more meals.) After the game, Peggy drove me to  my voting post (I had been unable to find it the last time I tried to vote, and  spent four hours driving in circles without finding it) where I cast my vote;  then she brought me home, coming in to put some of the glass cats etc., as well  as the many books that had to be replaced, after the carpet people left them  all piled together. It still is not finished! I do what little I can each day,  but it is getting increasingly difficult for me to do anything more physical  than sitting and watching TV, writing Fax Facts, or napping. But the way the  rooms are looking makes me believe it was worth all the trouble I have put everybody  to. Thanks to all of you who helped us!
    Draft  Dodgers Anonymous
    Maude  Clark Pilgrim turned the motor of her 1939 Chevrolet sedan off (it had been  dark blue at one time, but was now slightly lighter and more mottled. But there  wasn’t a sign of dust or mud to be seen on it or in it) She opened  the door and stepped out into the blazing mid-morning sunshine of Ellisville,  Mississippi and dreaded the thirteen steps it would take her to enter the front  door of the Methodist Church. She tried the door, and it was locked. Wonderful!  She’d have the entire place to herself today! She could practice as much  as she liked, with no criticism in the form of questions about the rhythms and  tempi of Sunday’s hymns! She didn’t even mind the fact that she  would have to endure two or three minutes of heat that it would take her to  fight the door!
    Just as she was  about to enter the cool interior of the church, another car drove up and  stopped next to hers! She glared angrily at whoever he was! It was Hubert  Jordan. And he had that wretched son of his with him. They were getting out of  their car and began walking briskly towards her. 
    “G’mornin’,  Miz Pilgrim,” the father and son said in almost perfect unison.
    “Mornin;”  She replied. She did not bother to smile.
    “Marcus,  here, has a question he’d like to ask you.”
    “Well, I  hope I have the answer he wants,” she said. They both made a feeble  effort to smile. It came out as a grimace.
    “Miz  Pilgrim,” Marcus began with a frown on his boyish young face, “We  were just wondering if there is some way we could get ourselves called up for  the draft right away.”
    Well, that  certainly was a switch! She thought she knew when he said, “We”,  that he referred to the Imbragulio boy. “Listen, it’s too hot to  stand out here,” she said flatly. “Let’s get inside where it  is cooler, at least.”
    They followed her  obediently into the House of the Lord, trying to be as pleasant as possible.
    She led them down  the center aisle to the front row of the church before saying, “I do wish  you had come to my office in the court house. This is slightly  irregular.”
    “Would you  rather we go there now? Or do you want us to come by your office later in the  week?” It was the boy’s father, Hubert, doing the talking.
    “No,  No,” spoken quickly had a rather ominous sound about it. “You have  your mail to deliver, I am well aware of that.” She turned to face  Marcus. Frankly, she was just about to burst with curiosity. Why would these  two, all of a sudden, want to get into the Army, when they had both been dodging  the draft for years (especially the little foreign boy!) “Now.  You’re both 1-A,  I believe?”
        “Yes’m,”  Marcus was trying very hard not to laugh. He had been doing imitations of Maude  Clark Pilgrim for Francis and George’s amusement ever since he had tried  to show them what she sounded like. And his whistling, “Fran-sisss”  never failed to send them into paroxysms of laughter. Now, he was definitely  treading on treacherous ground!
     “Well,”  she continued. “actually it is simply a matter of volunteering
    for the draft: but so  far, I have never had anyone who actually wanted to do this!”
                “So,  do we need to come to the courthouse and sign anything?” his brow always  furrowed when he was nervous or self conscious (which was 9/10 of the time.)
               “Oh,  I don’t think that will be necessary at all!” And she actually  almost smiled! “But be aware that we can only draft as many each month,  as that particular month’s quota. And I’m pretty sure the quotas  are filled for the rest of the summer.”
               A big  lump rose up in the younger 
               The two  walked out of the church, got into their Ford and drove away.
               Mrs.  Pilgrim, glad to be rid of them,  almost ran to the Wurlitzer console where she  turned on the chimes stop and began playing her signature hymn: fortissimo as  always: “The Old Rugged Cross”. Francis heard it, from his living  room, as he always did, and wondered how Marcus had fared with the old girl.
    2.
               Oddly  enough, the two volunteers had post cards in their family mail boxes two days  later, telling them that they were to be taken to Jackson on the following  Monday Morning, by bus. There they would undergo pre-induction physical  examinations, and other tests. Then they would be called up the very first time  she saw an opening. She added that she hoped this would be agreeable to their  wishes.
         The truth was, that  Maude could hardly wait to send them to the army: and she hoped they’d  have to go into the Infantry,  where they would have to work hard all the time.  She could not stand either one of the spoiled-rotten teen agers! Her boys had  both had terrible experiences while in the army during most of World War II.  Both of them had their health break down, and never fully recovered. Yes, she was  bitter. Her only regret was that there was (at this time) no war that she could  send them into.
    Meanwhile, Francis  and Marcus were excited about taking the first step towards their becoming   G.I.’s! 
           3.
        The big  air-conditioned Trailways bus stopped in front of Daddy’s Market where  Marcus and I stood waiting. Mama and Daddy were both waiting with us. Marcus  was by himself: his mother had passed away before the we had moved from  Richton, and the U.S. Mail had to be delivered every day.
               When the  door of the bus was thrown open, I gave each parent hug and a kiss, and we both  boarded the bus. I dared not look back, because I knew as well as I knew my  name, that Mama (and probably Daddy, too) would be crying (even though this was  just to be an overnight stay away from home, they were already considering me  as good as “Gone!” So, I have to admit: I had a slight lump of my  own, in my throat.)
               As we  entered the cool interior of the bus, we could barely see, so bright had the  sun been, that now we were literally blinded by the darkness at first.
    And then, from the  back of the bus, a familiar voice cried out, “Well! Look who’s  here!”
               I would  have known that voice anywhere! It belonged to one of the two boys who had made  my life a living hell, from the time we moved back to Ellisville from Richton,  in 1941, until the three of us had graduated from high school, in 1944: Jimmy  Townley! His evil constant companion was Tom Anderson, whose father owned the  Nehi Bottling Company that Daddy had owned at one time. Both of these boys had  no use for me, mainly because I would have nothing to do with them, did not go  out for football (they were both on the high school varsity team) and worst of  all: took piano lessons! They never passed up any opportunity to make a joke at  my expense. and always called me Dago, or a Sissy—or both!
               I was  struck by an inner voice that told me that just the presence of this loathsome  creature might be a bad omen! One furtive glance assured me that Tom Anderson  was not with his cohort! That made it a lot easier to bear. I even pretended to  be glad to see him. And I managed a generic smile. as I waved mutely to the  back row of the bus, as an entity.           
           “Do  you know any of these other fellows?” I asked Marcus.
               “A   few, but not by name,” he replied. Marcus was well aware of mine and the  football players’ mutual dislike of each other
               “Same  here. I know two or three that I recognize, but none of them were in any of my  classes.”
               Obviously,  the stop for our boarding the bus, was the last to be made. There were only two  or three vacant seats, and much to our disgust, somebody began singing,  “On Top of Old Smokey”! I can never forget the first time I ever  heard that song: I was in Miss Mildred Nicholson’s fifth grade class,  when she asked, one afternoon  (we had completed all of our assignments for the  day, and the dismissal bell had still not sounded), if anybody in the class  could sing a song for all of our entertainment.
               Imagine  my surprise when Ora Lee Burnet and her younger sister, Mary stood up. They  were giggling like two simpletons (which they really were!) and Miss Nicholson  asked them what they were going to sing for us. And then, with no accompaniment  these two sisters sang, “On top of old Smokey”---Well, never having  heard the song, as well as having no idea what “Old Smokey” was,  all I could do was thank God the girls at least had fairly decent voices, and  (astoundingly) were in perfect harmony without the benefit of a pitch pipe.
               Now,  with a distinct feeling of déjà vu,  I listened in disgust as several other fellows on the bus,  joined in the  singing of this old ditty.
    Soon, it seemed  that everybody on the bus was making some form of racket or other, and I was  reminded of what both of my brothers (who had been in the Army) told me when  they learned that I was about to be drafted after all: “Listen to all of  those fellas who make the most noise going somewhere, and then listen how quiet  they always get on the way back home.” I kept this little nugget, and  sure as the dickens, it proved to be true the following afternoon, on the  return trip back!  
    4. 
    Time we were  inside the building, we had to strip naked. And we stayed that way until noon!  Having been extremely modest when I  began taking Physical Education in the 11th  grade, I had (fortunately) become blasé over it. But we never stayed “In  the Buff” for so long a period of time! We were poked, peered at and  inspected beyond endurance! It was with immense relief that I got into my  clothing and we were finally served a decent lunch!
    The afternoon had  us taking what I could only guess were intelligence tests. If your score were  high enough, you would be allowed to become an army officer!
    That was when Dr.  Warren D. Allen’s parting advice to me, when I told him I was going into  the Army was remembered. He liked me (probably because I was the only graduate  student who knew anything about where to find the information necessary to  write term papers!) Every Master’s degree in music, from 
    Anyway, back to my  parting with old Warren D.: He took my hand and held it while looking me  straight in the eyes, and said, “Good luck, You’ll be just fine.  But don’t let them turn you into an officer: be a private. But make sure  you’re a Private First Class.” I remember how sweet I had found  this advice! I never even considered going to Officer’s Training classes.
    5.
    After a good  evening meal, we were sent back to the barracks, where we had stored our  over-night bags, and told to get a good night’s rest. We were advised not  to leave the premises.
    Marcus and I were  two of the first to take showers. Afterwards, as we decided that I should have  the lower birth (I had never slept in an upper-birth, while Marcus and his  older brother had always insisted on telling his sibling to take the upper)  since I probably would have ended up on the floor!
    We were lying on  top of the blankets, in our underwear, when Marcus said, “Uh oh!  You’ve got company!”     
    I glanced up to  see Jimmy Townley, walking towards us and grinning like a jackass eating briars  (one of Helen’s favorite phrases). “How about us all taking a bus  downtown to a movie?” He asked me.
    “I’m  all for that!” I said, ready to let bygone be bygones. I figured that he  really wasn’t so bad, without his side kick.
    “But,  Francis---they said we must not go off tonight!” The history of the  differences in our attitudes on military regulations were just beginning to  make their appearances.
            “So what do you think they’ll do to us?” Jimmy turned to  Marcus as  he
        asked this question. “Put us in front of a firing squad?”
            I smiled  and began getting dressed. “I saw that Young Bess is playing at the 
           He wanted  to see it, too. Three others came over and asked if we would mind it they came  with us. So, we left Marcus with the conformists and went outside where we were  lucky enough to catch a bus within five minutes or less.
           We all  enjoyed this thoroughly entertaining (albeit not too accurate) of how Henry,  the Eight’s daughter, became the Queen of England when he died.
               I will  admit. I had a few bad moments, on the bus ride back to our barracks after the  film—but they were unwarranted. Everything was in darkness, and the  sounds of snoring made me doubt that I would be able to get a wink of sleep.  But I was more exhausted than I had realized, and in no time at all, I was  sawing logs with the best of them!
    6.
               I was  awakened by Marcus, whose head was grinning down at me from his aerie above.  “Good morning!”  he greeted me jovially. I glanced around the huge  sleeping area. “Good morning, Glory!” I answered, without too much  enthusiasm.
               “How  was the movie?”
               “Oh!  I’m sure you would have loved it. We all did! It was Jean Simmons,  playing a young Queen Elizabeth. You remember her from Hamlet and Great Expectations. She is always good!”
               “You  know I don’t get to n’yilly as many films as your Dad allows you to  see!”
               “Well,  you must see this one, if it gets to Ellisville before we are inducted!”
    Cat  Naps Quotes
    “Dreams are  only thoughts you didn’t have time to think about during the day.”
    Author  Unknown
    WARLOCK!  
               When he  told me, after we knew each other a lot better, that his birthday      was  October 31, I almost died laughing! “Well, that makes you a male  witch!” 
               “Warlock!”  his laugh was low and deep throated.        
    By this time, I  had tears of laughter running down both cheeks! Ed Kohler and I just clicked  the very first time I saw him! 
    He had come into  my studio at the 
    “I  wouldn’t have cared if you looked like Count Dracula, I just wanted to be  out of her reach!”
    After I had been  here a few months, I happened to be in the office, chatting with Dr.  Jones’ (head of the Music Dept. at the time) secretary and she asked me  if I had any idea who this strange sounding person could be. I glanced over at  the list of the signee’s of the previous week’s recital she was  showing me, and almost gave Ed’s secret away! But I recovered and asked  the secretary how she thought the name should be pronounced. She laughed and  said she had never seen anything like it.
    I did venture this  comment: “Well, whoever it is---I’d like to know what the  nationality is!”
    I left her  shrieking with laughter. By the way, the secretary’s name was 
    2. 
    I had (for all too  brief a period) a cute little apartment in 
    After a couple of  weeks in the basement of the Administration building at 
    Now, at this point  in our relationship, I had no idea just how talented this young man was. I was  later to discover that his ability had no limit. None, whatsoever!
    Each student who  came in after he had put up those drapes; Alma Fisher and the entire music  department all said it was the prettiest thing they could imagine!
    By then, I had Ed  working on some very interesting pieces of Kabalevsky, Bach, and Schumann. He  really enjoyed practicing piano for the very first time (he told me). I’d  make up words (usually bawdy) to each of his pieces, and would sing them as he  played the tunes. He always cracked up, laughing heartily, as did I. Then he  would play the same piece a second time, this time with his own words. His  lessons were soon among my favorite. 
    He worked in the  mail room (down in the basement, next to my studio) and would often drop in,  between my students, just to chat. I was allowed to teach to teach private  students after school (the job itself paid next to nothing) and he came to know  all of these (mostly children) students. 
    Also in the basement,  was a snack bar, where we often ate our lunches. I can still fairly taste the  delicious shrimp sandwiches we could get there. He had told me about the woman  who waited on us most of the times we ate there. Her name was Mrs. Hall. Ed  called her Mrs. Corridor, and because he swore that she always stuck an  “uh” at the conclusion of every word she spoke, he called her  Missis Core-a-do-RAH. He swore that she always asked if we wanted our  sandwiches “Good to eat”. Or would we rather have them  “Pretty-UGH?”
    We both seemed  hell-bent on creating our own private language. I would take any name that had  more than one syllable, and repeat one of the syllables: this Kelly Moore  became Kell-Kell Moore. It was certainly silly, but it kept us amused. It  worked with almost any word, also. We would congratulate each other when we  deemed something super-silly (or sill-sill).
    I had a black  student whose name was Clare Mason. One of my dearest friends in 
    Claire  Maison de Ville, et noir, blee-ah!
    Ed disliked, also,  the band director at 
    Movie Trivia Quiz #59
    Biography Time (2)
    Which Actor or Actress  portrayed each real or fictional famous person in a screen Biography:
    1.      Livingston in 
    2.      George Sand in A  Song to Remember?
    3.      George Gershwin in Rhapsody  in Blue?
    4.     Leo Tolstoy in The Last Station?
    5.     De LeLesseps in 
    6,  Marie Antoinette in  MGM’s Marie Antoinette?
    7.Captain  Bligh in Mutiny on the Bounty?\
    8.      Abraham Lincoln in  Young Abe Lincoln?
    9.      Charles Lindberg  in The Spirit of 
        10. Emperor  Maximillian  in Warner Bros. Juarez,
    Answers to Quiz #58
    1.      Clara Schumann: Katherine Hepburn
    2.      Dr. Doolittle: Rex Harrison
    3.      Marie Curie: Greer Garson
    4.      Lon Chaney, Sr.: James Cagney
    5.      Henry VIII, in Young  Bess: Charles Laughton
    6.      Elizabeth I, in The  Private Lives of Elisabeth and Essex: Jean Simmons
    7.      Queen 
    8.      Queen Christina in the film of the same name; Greta  Garbo
    9.      
    10. FDR in 
    
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